Grief Tending
When we lose someone we love, our entire world changes. Nothing feels the same. We can feel the need to come undone, to deconstruct. Ideally, we have a supportive community to help hold us in this painful time, but that is often not the case. Our culture tends to shame us for having dark feelings, but often the darkness is the very place we need to be to process, to fall apart, to re-member.
My own deep loss created a great need in me to understand Grief, what is was, and how to be with it. Walking in wild nature, reading the works of poets such as Mary Oliver, the teachings of Francis Weller, of Clarissa Pinkola Estes, Martín Prechtel, Miriam Greenspan, being a part of a Soulful Life Community, and finding other beautiful broken-hearted folks, all helped lay a path for me, step by step, to learn to be with and have reverence for this rich, hard, sacred path.
I aim to walk alongside you in this necessary realm, to reframe its importance, to help to befriend and know it, and find the richness in this precious, sacred work of mourning and loving the one you lost, whether it is through death, divorce, earth loss, or others.
This is not easy work, but I find that learning to tend the grief and show up for it tends to create a smoother path in the long run of life, and helps us open to the dark beauties, the spacious joys and presence that grieving makes spaces for.
Collaborating with you to create a holding space, a vessel, in which you can work to keep your grief warm, and allow it to transform, we work together on this walk to meet the needs of your soul, respectful of your beliefs and experiences.
Child Loss
Pregnancy, Infant and Child Loss
Losing a child is a particular loss, one that is deeper than deep. Our children are so close to our bodies, and our love for them is intensely bonded to all of our cells. When a child dies, our bodies and souls go into a deep state of mourning, and it is incredibly hard to keep moving, keep living, to know how to make sense of our lives.
I am honored to help you walk through these dark days, whether it is 5 weeks or 50 years after your loss, as you do the needed work of grieving their bodily absence from this life, and learn to love them in this new relationship. Holding a loving, understanding, non-judgmental presence for you, I help you to grieve and remember, and continue loving.
As someone who has lost a child, I know personally how healing it is to receive the simple act of presence in the midst of intense pain. My hope is to create a vessel, a space, in which this work can slowly, carefully take place. Some practices we may work with to help you include sitting quietly together, nature-based grounding, writing, art, reading poetry, breath work, co-creation of rituals or practices that help you work your love and sadness, and practices that help you connect to the greater whole to help hold you in this place. Each person has their own path and we find what works best together. We will always work within the spiritual beliefs you hold.
“To go in the dark with a light is to know the light.
To know the dark, go dark. Go without sight,
and find that the dark, too, blooms and sings,
and is traveled by dark feet and dark wings.”
Wendell Berry
